Yes, I have a sty on my eye; or something like that. So at about 1 a.m yesterday it occurs to me to try toothpaste on it. Fluorine; acidic properties. oxidiser. Yes, it might help. So i squeeze out a sizable portion, so as to cover the whole thing, and dab it on. <pause> PAIN! excrutiating pain! I'm used to stinging substances in the eye, mind you; Sidhalepa, Axe oil and such. But this beat the lot. And do you know how difficult it is to wash off toothpaste? from your eye? well, do you? it took 10 minutes!
The whole eye-area looks a ghastly puffed-up red. Borderline obsessive-compulsive that i am, i reason out that its because i got stuff 'in' the eye that mucked up the works. So this time, I get myself just enough toothpaste to just dab on the sty.
<sigh>
pain. howl. wash out eye. in short, repeat performance.
It seems that the eyelids work in such a way as to get stuff on the rim of the lid, inside your eye. A design flaw, no doubt.
So i go to bed sans-toothpaste-on-sty. I get up next morning to see it bleeding. Absolutely pouring.
I blame it on the eye-surgeons who weren't available the previous day. I blame the medical profession which doesn't allow you to call a doctor up and get medication over the phone. I blame it on the toothpaste. I blame it on the river hobbit! No, i do NOT blame it on my stupidity!
And if anyone finds this funny, i hope that they get toothpaste in their eye!
urped by gumz @ 5:15 PM
